Your list of criteria for a future mate should not resemble your lengthy grocery-shopping list or the apartment- or house-hunting checklist you hand your real estate agent. For one thing, you decrease your chances of finding a relationship if your love list is too long and spe- cific; for another, a long checklist takes the romance and spontaneity out of truly connecting with someone you have not met yet! I once heard a guy say that he could not describe his perfect woman before he met her, just as he can't describe a beautiful painting before he has seen it. Depending on your perspective, this guy is either won- derfully romantic or terribly cheesy . . . but he has a point!
Even though I do not like the checklists many singles are currently using, I do think it is important to be mindful and aware of the qualities you would like to find in your mate.
Naturally, you want to find someone who reflects your values and embraces your passions. Your mate should also fulfill your needs for four essential roles: partner, friend, companion, and lover.