What we choose to focus on determines how we feel. When we change our focus to love and connection, our problems can be solved. When we focus on our needs for love, for growth, and for contribution—on serving beyond ourselves—most emotional problems and sources of pain will disappear.
In many ways, contribution is the human need that effectively regulates your other five needs. If you are focused on contribution, you have the Certainty of being able to contribute (there is always a way), you have Variety (contribution is always interactive), you have Significance (the commitment to contribution defines you as a rare and extraordinary human being), you have Connection (helping others always creates a spiritual bond), and you have to Grow (to contribute requires going beyond your own needs).
But at times, it's important to break through the obstacles to allow for growth and contribution. And there are several beliefs that hold us back from doing jsut that. These are what we have to watch out for: